Eeyore's Little Space

excitingscaryexciting

Today I had my naturopath visit. Yes, we addressed my mental health - where I worry all the time over things I have no control over. We talked about my diet and my mood and my energy levels. And then I came home with pre-natal vitamins. !#$%&?

I'm feeling calmer about my birthday - in two months. Part of the issue I think is this extra 30lbs I'm walking around with. It's hard to live your best life when you're sitting on the sidelines being self-conscious. Today I had a salad for lunch so that's a start!

Happy Anniversay Mom and Dad!!

CB

Approaching 30

Those of you who have already turned 30 - which is all of my 3 blog readers - may laugh at this post. But, hopefully you'll relate instead.

In about 2 months (10 weeks J says, since that's also the day that contraception gets thrown away) I will turn 30. And while I'm certain that I'm going to rock my 30's, I can't help feeling like all of a sudden I'm going to be saying "In about 2 months I will turn 80." (Probably the contraception part will be moote by that time.) I'm turning into a complete psycho who thinks about the speed of life and dying every single day. I'm worried that I didn't do what I was supposed to do in my 20's and that now I"ll never have the chance to do it - like wear a bikini in a convertible in LA. Seriously, where do these ideas come from? Then when I think about being 80 before I know it I wonder how I will die - will I go gently? Or not so much? Will I fight it? Will I keep my eyes open until the last second or will I close my eyes and sleep? My poor husband is worried about my mental health - should he be? Should I be making an appointment with the shrink? Or just pour a glass of wine, get a pedicure, and a new haircut? I don't know.

In other news - I'm trying very hard (95% of the time anway) to lose weight before the attempts at baby start. I'm also planning a fashion overhaul for my birthday - I'm setting aside a whole paycheck for this. Pretty exciting!!

There are people in the kitchen installing cabinets - they will be done everything tomorrow they say. We are going to buy our countertop today - they will come measure it next week. Then J will order our backsplash on Tuesday. Our door knobs and drawer pulls are ordered, our under cabinet lighting is ordered, the paint is bought, the appliances are on their way - it's all coming together!! Can't wait.

Hope you're all having a fabulous Saturday - and you're all invited for wine to celebrate the new kitchen -- or Baileys, or Coke - whatever!

Lots of love

CB

Some thoughts on a sunny Sunday

I was driving home from church just now, the sun was shining, and I started thinking about what people were doing for lunch after church. Did they go to a restaurant? Did they go home and whip something up? And I was remembering that some of my favourite lunches were grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup. Oh yes - and pickles! And I don't think this was my favourite because of the menu choices, it was the sameness - the routine of having lunch together as a family after church.

I'm thinking that remembering this is all part of nesting - the desire to create your own experiences and traditions with your own family. The day will come I'm sure. I wonder - do you know you're creating memories as you're going about?

Hope you're all having a fantastice start to 2012!

CB